Blink and You're Dead
Hello there! I'm Cory and I spend way to much time on the internet. I reblog a bunch of random stuff all day and sometimes wander outside my room to eat.

Ask me anything, I don't have a life. :)
summershadowtwin:

tramtheram:

summershadowtwin:

best-of-funny:


lizard lizard

X

Correction: Brought home my last parrot in a box.  By the time we got home, there was no more box.

According to the sheet your parrot is infact a hamster.

It’s mother was a hamster, and it’s father smelled of elderberries.






otterparade:

congragulation:

the only ship i need is a scholarship can i get a hallelujah

image



spoopytodd:

spoopytodd:

ok but think abt the aquaman movie tho think abt seeing this for 2 hours:

image

no really guys 2 hours of this:

image


awpurplepoptart:

peetasallhehasleft:

anachronisticsiren:


Anne Hathaway as Mary Poppins (Saturday Night Live, April 10, 2008) [x]

#MIA ARE YOU MOCKING YOUR GRANDMA?????
A+ tag from camyberry



it got better

A limerick:

toothlessrebel:

asgardiantelevision:

image

Doesn’t look like a limerick to you? Try this:

A dozen, a gross, and a score
Plus three times the square root of four
Divided by seven
Plus five times eleven
Is nine squared and not a bit more.

THE FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCCCKKKKKKK



the 2 types of parents when it comes to letting kids stay home from school
parent 1 : oh you don't want to go to school today? aww it's ok honey you can stay at home if you want :)
parent 2 : unless u got blood coming out of ur ears u goin 2 school

but do they use leashes????
Posted on October 15 with 868 notes at 4:01 pm

sasukeapologist:

i used to be so weirded out by the fact that everyone takes notes in pen in college because that seems so permanent right, what if you mess up a word, youll have to scribble it out and live with ugly notes

now that i write in pen i realize that i no longer have the strength of will to push down a pencil hard enough to make legible marks. im literally too dead inside to use a pencil. pen is the only way to make proof of my existence at this point